Marble

Hello Alorians

 

Honestly I'm probably the most experienced pker in the wildy, you all dont know but I've been pking since Andrew Gower recorded his nan cooking bacon for the cooking sound. 

 

I've met some of the brightest pking minds on runefest, names include but are not limited to, Odablock, 1013, Hamzawi, Mob and Westham. They've pretty much all agreed that this is a bit problem and is ruining the deep wildy. 

 

Safing, a very big problem in the Alora wildy. Everyone is safing up to 115+, how are you supposed to get a kill that way? Surpassing your recommended amount of daily calories is not a skill. Showing how fast ur now probably sausage shaped fingers can move to your protect from melee prayer is a real skill that transfers to real life aswel. It's like clicking the 20 piece chicken mcnugget meal on the order screen as fast as u can.

 

Stop safing, it's disgusting, you're just showing how bad you are. Not safing, now thats fucking Runescape right there. None of that pansy ass dick tugging smile to the admins bullshit. Men puke, men poop in the rev caves, men deliver their new born baby on the multi lines. Fucking hard core dick in the ass butterball Runescape fuck it chuck it game time shit.

 

Stop safing

ROFL omg

Things have changed, friends.

How far has the game of Alora.io fallen since the departure of #Peeks?

How could Dan allow every staff member, minus one, to form a clan to further their own interests without checks and balances?

How could a group of unconnected, old players from 2+ years ago successfully infiltrate Paragon within 3 days of playing?

How, despite having every available tool in their belt, could they allow themselves to be humiliated like this?

Peeks Intelligence Officers in association with ICE shooters present: The downfall of Paragon
 

It's been a fun few years friends, playing other games, playing other servers, attending to real life.

It unfortunately seems our contemporaries haven't had the same luck.
Still grinding away at Alora.
Still mindlessly answering help PM's on where to kill blue dragons 16 hours a day in hopes of that BIG promotion someday.
Still allowing themselves to be outsmarted on and off the battlefield.
Still dying.
Still LOSING.

After receiving a VERY funny video three days ago of forum moderator and Paragon Lieutenant "To Gain" being speared for max by PVM clan ICE, we decided originally to come, have some fun, laugh a bit, and marvel at the current state of the game.




Since then, we've not only racked up NUMEROUS kills on them.










What the FUCK is this team doing indeed, Dreamland? 

We know you're not here for killpics though. It's unquestioned that we would smoke them if we returned.

You're here for the juicy stuff.

Using their OWN members, we've obtained inside information.

After a few kills, internally Kaamea tried to calm the situation down a bit, insisting they AREN'T a PVP clan.



We found this a bit funny as it says PVP RIGHT there..



Or maybe the fact Dreamland said the MAJORITY of pkers AND pvmers inside the wilderness were part of Paragon, leading him to temporarily leave his clan as he couldn't find ANY fights?



This guy's a VERY interesting case. After making him a victim for years when we played, his ego has swelled beyond the size of his brain.

Flaming us in public, but behind closed doors WARNING his teammates to stay safe from our wrath, even complimenting us!



Is this type of weird doublethink and fear the reason Paragon members would spy?

Or is it their odd discord culture?



Either way, for the time being, we are accepting two more Paragon spies.
We can pay HANDSOMELY for what we require.

You aren't happy.

You aren't winning.

Join the victors on the winning side.

Horror#1020 to spy.

l0000000000l PM Horror#1020 to confidentially discuss spying (and even the disgusting psychological urges you possess). Some of your members may already be trying to get their hands on the prize first

 

 

eim btw

 

made this video for @Extremedanny but decided to share here anyway

 

 

yea i know bad quality